Morning, Freaks.
As the title of this post implies, it's been awhile since I've left you with a simple post of just a little music, without me bombarding you with politics and subliminal cues for social revolution.
So here you go.
Normally, I don't go for this type of indie-rock hipster trash. I don't know what it is about this cut, maybe it's just the fact that I'm still trying to work out my boyhood man-crush on Little Pete from The Adventures of Pete & Pete. But I just can't stop hitting the replay button on this one. And if I have to suffer, then damnit, so do you.
Enjoy what's left of the weekend freaks. Much Love.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Your Own Private Bunker!!
Who remembers all those cute little back-yard bomb shelters you'd see in old TV shows dating from the Cold War? Well, apparently, these shelters are back on the market, and business is booming.
From CNN: Sales of Luxury Doomsday Bunkers Up 1,000%
God bless capitalism. Gotta make that dollah-dollah bill, y'all.
With increased fear in the light of the uprisings in the Middle East, combined with the geological activity that has so plagued Japan, the interest in securing a safe place for one's family in the wake of a natural or political disaster is soaring through the roof. Companies like Vivos and Hardened Structures are seeing sales skyrocket, for everything from personal and private apocalypse-proof shelters, to reservations in more community based bunkers.
One of Vivos' most ambitious structures is capable of housing up to nearly 1,000 people for a full year, as well as surviving a direct 450-megaton blast. The cost of a reservation in one of these units rings in at about $45,000 per person.
Call me cynical (probably won't be the first time if you've been reading this blog for awhile), but who the hell would want to survive in a situation like that? Is life that precious to you that you'd rather shell up supplies in hopes of surviving some disaster of Biblical proportions just so you can be among the few that blindly wander the wastelands left after the fall of society? Wouldn't it be a little more enjoyable to take that $45,000 price tag and drop it on a seriously heavy vacation? If you're so convinced that the end of days is indeed upon the horizon, wouldn't you rather squeeze as much pleasure out of those last days rather than ensure you survive the cataclysm only to suffer indefinitely in the chaos that would surely follow?
I'm sure most, if not all, of you will be familiar with this children's song:
From CNN: Sales of Luxury Doomsday Bunkers Up 1,000%
God bless capitalism. Gotta make that dollah-dollah bill, y'all.
With increased fear in the light of the uprisings in the Middle East, combined with the geological activity that has so plagued Japan, the interest in securing a safe place for one's family in the wake of a natural or political disaster is soaring through the roof. Companies like Vivos and Hardened Structures are seeing sales skyrocket, for everything from personal and private apocalypse-proof shelters, to reservations in more community based bunkers.
One of Vivos' most ambitious structures is capable of housing up to nearly 1,000 people for a full year, as well as surviving a direct 450-megaton blast. The cost of a reservation in one of these units rings in at about $45,000 per person.
Call me cynical (probably won't be the first time if you've been reading this blog for awhile), but who the hell would want to survive in a situation like that? Is life that precious to you that you'd rather shell up supplies in hopes of surviving some disaster of Biblical proportions just so you can be among the few that blindly wander the wastelands left after the fall of society? Wouldn't it be a little more enjoyable to take that $45,000 price tag and drop it on a seriously heavy vacation? If you're so convinced that the end of days is indeed upon the horizon, wouldn't you rather squeeze as much pleasure out of those last days rather than ensure you survive the cataclysm only to suffer indefinitely in the chaos that would surely follow?
I'm sure most, if not all, of you will be familiar with this children's song:
Row, Row, Row your boat,It would seem to me that we have forgotten this pivotal truth of life that was so easily acceptable in youth. It's Just A Ride people. And like all rides, this one is sure to end one day, too. Enjoy it while you can.
Gently down the stream.
Merrily, Merrily, Merrily, Merrily,
Life is but a dream
Friday, July 29, 2011
Now You Know!!
And knowing is half the battle!!
From The Sydney Morning Herald: RAAF airman seriously burnt in toilet explosion
Sounds like a Jackass 3.0 bit.
So apparently a member of the Royal Australian Air Force suffered third degree burns to his face, arms, hands, and airways after he triggered an explosion by lighting a cigarette in a chemical toilet. Or a "portaloo", as they call it in Aussie-speak.
What the fuck kind of chemicals are they using in these porta-pottys? Speaking from personal experience, I have probably smoked at least a full pack of cigarettes over the years in various Porta-Johns over the years. Not only that, but drawing from my moe. run last week and the intense smell of pot that I smelled from people trying to avoid concert security by blazing a quick one in the toilets, the fact that they're claiming that lighting a cigarette somehow triggered this explosion is utterly baffling. I mean, if you're smoking a bowl in one of these things, that requires a lot more usage of an open flame than the one spark it takes to light up a cigarette. And the whole damn toilet exploded right in this guys face!
So, my fellow cancer-ridden tobacco enthusiasts, be wary the next time you decide to light one up while you're taking a load off and pinching a loaf. You might just trigger a reaction that could result in you carrying burn scars that would put Freddy Kruger to shame.
From The Sydney Morning Herald: RAAF airman seriously burnt in toilet explosion
Sounds like a Jackass 3.0 bit.
So apparently a member of the Royal Australian Air Force suffered third degree burns to his face, arms, hands, and airways after he triggered an explosion by lighting a cigarette in a chemical toilet. Or a "portaloo", as they call it in Aussie-speak.
What the fuck kind of chemicals are they using in these porta-pottys? Speaking from personal experience, I have probably smoked at least a full pack of cigarettes over the years in various Porta-Johns over the years. Not only that, but drawing from my moe. run last week and the intense smell of pot that I smelled from people trying to avoid concert security by blazing a quick one in the toilets, the fact that they're claiming that lighting a cigarette somehow triggered this explosion is utterly baffling. I mean, if you're smoking a bowl in one of these things, that requires a lot more usage of an open flame than the one spark it takes to light up a cigarette. And the whole damn toilet exploded right in this guys face!
So, my fellow cancer-ridden tobacco enthusiasts, be wary the next time you decide to light one up while you're taking a load off and pinching a loaf. You might just trigger a reaction that could result in you carrying burn scars that would put Freddy Kruger to shame.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
God Hates Manatees
Yep. That's right. The cute, cuddly, cow faced basis for the myth of mermaids are under attack. And who could have enough hate in their hearts to turn the political sword against these gentle creatures? Who else but the bible-thumping Tea Party-ers!
In the Tampa, Florida area of Citrus County, Tea Party member Edna Mattos has taken up arms against the dastardly manatees, railing against wildlife preservation regulations that protect the endangered creatures.
The 63 year old Florida resident has picketed outside local court houses, and taken her battle to the web looking for support in lifting the federal regulations that protect these waters. Claiming that the wildlife protection is a federal conspiracy aiming to turn people into livestock and infringe upon their basic God-given American freedoms to do whatever the hell they damn well please, Mattos has received over 800 online signatures in support of her efforts.
Explaining the basis for her hypocrisy of wanting to remove the manatee protections and still enjoying taking her grandchildren to experience the creatures, Mattos says "If some of these environmental movements had been around in the days of the dinosaurs, we'd be living in Jurassic Park now."
Well, you just can't argue with that sound logic. Tossing in the towel. Sorry little seaweed-munching manatees. Jesus says we don't need your types around here anymore.
Sound the alarm. The manatees are coming.
In the Tampa, Florida area of Citrus County, Tea Party member Edna Mattos has taken up arms against the dastardly manatees, railing against wildlife preservation regulations that protect the endangered creatures.
We cannot elevate nature above people. That's against the Bible and the Bill of Rights.Yes. Indeed. It is against the Bible and the Bill of Rights to shepherd the weak, and defend those that can not defend themselves. Nothing sounds more Christian and American to me. Get the powerboats, we're going manatee hunting.
The 63 year old Florida resident has picketed outside local court houses, and taken her battle to the web looking for support in lifting the federal regulations that protect these waters. Claiming that the wildlife protection is a federal conspiracy aiming to turn people into livestock and infringe upon their basic God-given American freedoms to do whatever the hell they damn well please, Mattos has received over 800 online signatures in support of her efforts.
Explaining the basis for her hypocrisy of wanting to remove the manatee protections and still enjoying taking her grandchildren to experience the creatures, Mattos says "If some of these environmental movements had been around in the days of the dinosaurs, we'd be living in Jurassic Park now."
Well, you just can't argue with that sound logic. Tossing in the towel. Sorry little seaweed-munching manatees. Jesus says we don't need your types around here anymore.
Sound the alarm. The manatees are coming.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
The Guns! The Bayonettes! The Gore and Death! THE CANNONBALLS!!!
I'm back, kids!
So, like I said a little over a week ago, I was running all over the northeast chasing moe. I missed a few posts, and I'm sorry for that, but some times you just have to damn the weather and answer the call.
Luckily for the rest of you, moe. isn't doing much until moe.down 12, so you don't have to worry about me taking another leave of absence until Labor Day weekend.
And with that, there is only one way to break back into this cycle here. And that's with a story about some Monkeys on Ecstasy.
From People's Daily Online: Monkeys Trained as Battlefield Killers in Afghanistan
OK, they're not really on ecstasy, but they're still fascinating little primates.
In what is being seen as an effort to combat the American tactic of using unmanned drone strikes against their enemies, Taliban forces have reportedly been training monkeys in the lethal arts of warfare. Armed with AK-47s and Bren light machine guns, these monkey soldiers have been spotting patrolling the Pakistan-Afghanistan border.
According to the article however, this is not the first time monkeys have been trained for combat. Apparently the CIA were the first to try and train primates for war, to be used in Vietnam in the 60s and 70s. The article neglects to mention how successful these attempts may or may not have been, and I'm guessing the success rates weren't too hot, seeing as this is the first I'm hearing of armed chimps being used in war.
You have to wonder what effect instructing these animals in the use of weapons might have on the course of their natural evolution. Is it possible that we might inadvertently be pressing the fast forward button on these little critters? Perhaps the Rise of the Planet of the Apes is indeed upon us.
Enjoy what's left of your weekend boys and girls. I'll be back tomorrow, same Monkey time, same Monkey channel.
So, like I said a little over a week ago, I was running all over the northeast chasing moe. I missed a few posts, and I'm sorry for that, but some times you just have to damn the weather and answer the call.
Luckily for the rest of you, moe. isn't doing much until moe.down 12, so you don't have to worry about me taking another leave of absence until Labor Day weekend.
And with that, there is only one way to break back into this cycle here. And that's with a story about some Monkeys on Ecstasy.
From People's Daily Online: Monkeys Trained as Battlefield Killers in Afghanistan
OK, they're not really on ecstasy, but they're still fascinating little primates.
In what is being seen as an effort to combat the American tactic of using unmanned drone strikes against their enemies, Taliban forces have reportedly been training monkeys in the lethal arts of warfare. Armed with AK-47s and Bren light machine guns, these monkey soldiers have been spotting patrolling the Pakistan-Afghanistan border.
According to the article however, this is not the first time monkeys have been trained for combat. Apparently the CIA were the first to try and train primates for war, to be used in Vietnam in the 60s and 70s. The article neglects to mention how successful these attempts may or may not have been, and I'm guessing the success rates weren't too hot, seeing as this is the first I'm hearing of armed chimps being used in war.
You have to wonder what effect instructing these animals in the use of weapons might have on the course of their natural evolution. Is it possible that we might inadvertently be pressing the fast forward button on these little critters? Perhaps the Rise of the Planet of the Apes is indeed upon us.
Enjoy what's left of your weekend boys and girls. I'll be back tomorrow, same Monkey time, same Monkey channel.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Baby, I Need A Miracle
An 80s power-rock ballad immediately makes anything sexy and awesome.
Proof:
Enjoy the day freaks.
Proof:
Enjoy the day freaks.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Big Brother is Watching You
Depending on where you live these days, odds are you're becoming painfully aware of the growing popularity of traffic cameras being used to mark traffic violators and sending out tickets in the mail. I've gotten a handful of them myself. This is where the normal debate begins between the "Don't Tread on Me" crowd and the "Why are you worried if you have nothing to hide?" camp.
Well, for those of you who don't get that squeamish feeling at the thought of state run cameras at every intersection, check this out.
From Disinfo.com: Vehicle Registration Plate Surveillance System
The article does a good job of providing a cursory overview of the procedures being used in the UK for tracking the locations of vehicles as they traverse the countryside, using a combination of pictures of vehicle plates and the passengers of the vehicles to create a data farm on driving patterns in the area. While the state staunchly denies allegations that this data mining will be used to build profiles on law-abiding citizens, they do not deny holding on to these data sets.
And so continues the inexorable march to the bleak future of complete lack of personal privacy. I remember hearing someone talk about the future once, saying that while we all clamor now for our 5 minutes of fame, it won't be very long until we're scrambling for 5 simple minutes of peace and privacy in our entire lives. Really gives you hope for tomorrow, huh?
Thank God we got Joey Diaz out there speaking truth for all us sinners.
Much love.
Well, for those of you who don't get that squeamish feeling at the thought of state run cameras at every intersection, check this out.
From Disinfo.com: Vehicle Registration Plate Surveillance System
The article does a good job of providing a cursory overview of the procedures being used in the UK for tracking the locations of vehicles as they traverse the countryside, using a combination of pictures of vehicle plates and the passengers of the vehicles to create a data farm on driving patterns in the area. While the state staunchly denies allegations that this data mining will be used to build profiles on law-abiding citizens, they do not deny holding on to these data sets.
And so continues the inexorable march to the bleak future of complete lack of personal privacy. I remember hearing someone talk about the future once, saying that while we all clamor now for our 5 minutes of fame, it won't be very long until we're scrambling for 5 simple minutes of peace and privacy in our entire lives. Really gives you hope for tomorrow, huh?
Thank God we got Joey Diaz out there speaking truth for all us sinners.
Much love.
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