Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Who Pays for these Studies??

File this one under "Weird Shit I Probably Didn't Need to Know"

From MSNBC: Sex With Animals Linked To Penis Cancer

First, let me open by once again thanking the good people over at Disinfo.com for so tirelessly laboring to ensure these sort of news gems do not go unnoticed. You people truly are fighting the good fight.

The results of a study taken in a rural area of Brazil, claims to have shown that a history of bestiality can be linked to occurrences of penile cancer. The study, which surveyed 492 men who were either healthy or afflicted by penile cancer, found that 45% of men who suffered from the ailment reported also having sex with animals. Other possible causes mentioned in the study were "smoking, the presence of premalignant lesions on the penis and phimosis, a condition where the foreskin cannot be retracted over the penis."

The article goes on to briefly discuss what it sees as a long standing history of inter-species relations, and how it believes that micro-trauma from prolonged animal intercourse could open the organ up for attack from cancerous agents, providing a possible explanation for the correlated rise of cases of penile cancer in men who engage in bestiality. Fascinating read, provided you can keep your lunch down.

Of course, the article also does a bang-up job of glossing over an alarming statistic. They found that 32% of men who had no outbreak of penile cancer also reported having sex with animals. That's one-in-three for fucks-sake!

Alright, let's play with these numbers a little bit. The MSNBC report states that of 492 men surveyed, 118 of them were victims of penile cancer. Of that 118, 45% - or ~53 patients - reported having sex with animals. Which leaves 374 of the original 492 which did NOT have penile cancer. Of this 374, 32% - or ~120 patients - reported having sex with animals. Meaning there are more men, both healthy and cancer afflicted, who admit to having intercourse with animals then there are total men that have been found to have penile cancer.

I'm not exactly sure what all those numbers might mean in a medical sense. But I'll tell you one thing for damn sure - there are far too many people candidly admitting to having sexually violated the local livestock. And if a total of 35% of these rural Brasillians are admitting to having sex with animals, then I'd say it is safe to hazard a guess that the real figures are somewhere around 65%.

Three Monkeys Say: Love - the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket!!

1 comment:

  1. Yo M0ehoawk, I'm a coworker of Jeremy's. This was informative, necessary and absolutely hilarious. I wanna post a link to your blog from my website and hopefully you can do the same. Email me at thebostonjew@gmail.com

    My site is www.BostonJew.com