Thursday, February 16, 2012

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

OK, it was all fun and games when the headlines were telling of mass avian suicide last year, with bird death tolls inexplicably rising into unheard of numbers. Or the stories of millions of fish dying across the globe. We all stood around the water coolers and quipped that surely this would be a herald of the end of days, and laughed. Well friends, I'm no longer laughing with this next story.

From Why Are So Many Dolphins Beaching Themselves?

According to LiveScience, dolphins have been beaching themselves in record numbers across the globe. In Cape Cod alone about 5 times the average number of dolphins over a period of 12 years have died so far. Rescue workers are doing their best to save the creatures, but reports are making the fight seem an uphill battle.

The piece goes on to provide a number of plausible explanations for the odd occurance, ranging from the old standby Global Warming to disease and movement of prey. But there is no mention of apocalyptic explanations, or the similarity to the dolphins in Douglass Adams' Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, in which the world's population of dolphins flees the earth moments before it is obliterated to make room for a new intergalactic super highway. Is it possible that these intelligent sea creatures are shuffling off this mortal coil and fleeing to the astral plane ahead of some unforeseen catastrophe?

Forget possible. It's a fact. You heard it here first kids. Shout it from the mountain. The sky is indeed falling.

Three Monkeys Say: Some one call the expert, this needs to be investigated. Post-Haste.

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