Thursday, April 14, 2011

Where We're Going, We Don't Need Roads

If you're planning on making any trips to China any time soon (not that I would recommend it with all the artists, bloggers and activists mysteriously disappearing as of late), make sure you leave your Delorian at home.

China Bans Time-Travel in Television

In what has to be one of the oddest news stories I've ever had the privilege of reading, CNN is reporting that the Chinese State Administration of Radio Film and Television recently rolled out a new set of guidelines directing the entertainment sector to steer clear of the topic of time travel. Now, temporal exploration isn't the only fantastical genre getting the axe, the article also states that any production involving "fantasy, time-travel, random compilations of mythical stories, bizarre plots, absurd techniques, even propagating feudal superstitions, fatalism and reincarnation, ambiguous moral lessons, and a lack of positive thinking" are socially unacceptable as they go against Chinese heritage.

To quote one of my favorite air-guitar shredding time-travelers, "...whoa."

To me, this is just a perfect example of culture shock. As much as I bitch and moan and rail against corruption in America, I still thank my lucky stars that I hail from a land where a story like this seems more outlandish than the fiction it is fighting to suppress. I just can't even imagine what the hell the Chinese government hopes to accomplish by enforcing such an absurd regulation.

Now, the article doesn't go into any detail on how they plan on enforcing this new regulation, or what the proposed punishment for disobedience might be, but given the current political climate and the widespread mysterious disappearances of "political dissenters", I'd be pretty nervous about airing old re-runs of Quantum Leap right now.

I think I've found the truth behind all this madness however. They're just looking for away to keep Bill and Ted off the television sets there so they don't have to work extra hard hiding the fact that the Mongols once ruled China.

Strange things indeed, Mr. Logan. Strange things indeed.

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